Black Thumb

This is my first early birthday present to myself. I bought this orchid plant at the farmer's market this weekend. I bought it because the lady assured me that they are very easy to keep alive. All I have to do is water her once every three weeks. I even told orchid lady about my yearly repeated failure to grow anything and keep it alive. (This year I tried to grow cilantro... got five measly stalks that barely made a batch of salsa.) She still said she thought I could keep my orchid alive.

After the market I was reading through the directions I was given for my orchid and I came upon words like secondary bloom, flowering segment of the spike, cut the spike off the node, repotting, propagation... Didn't I tell her that I am the grim reaper of plants! I will pay someone one hundred dollars if this thing makes it to see 2009.

But I don't have one hundred dollars.